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Sep 01, 2025

When Siblings Disagree About Senior Care

Written By: Home Instead Edmonton
Siblings

5 Ways to Reduce Family Conflict When Discussing Senior Care

As summer ends and families return to routine, many adult children in Edmonton notice new or worsening changes in their parents’ health. Maybe Dad seems more forgetful than he did in June, or Mom is having a harder time managing meals and medication. These changes can spark urgent conversations among siblings about what kind of care their aging parents truly need.

But what happens when brothers and sisters don’t see eye to eye? Disagreements about senior care are common — and they can quickly turn into emotional conflicts that strain relationships. If your family is facing this challenge, you are not alone. At Home Instead Edmonton, we regularly support families who are navigating these difficult conversations and decisions.

Here are five practical ways to reduce family conflict when siblings disagree about senior care — and ensure your parent’s well-being stays at the heart of the discussion.

1. Put Your Parent’s Voice First

It’s easy for siblings to get caught up in debating what they think is best. But the most important perspective is your parent’s. Whenever possible, involve them in the conversation. Ask open questions:

  • How do you feel about living at home right now?
  • What tasks are becoming harder for you?
  • What would make you feel safer and more comfortable?
    Respecting your parent’s wishes builds trust and helps prevent arguments among siblings. It also sets the tone that decisions should focus on dignity, independence, and safety.

2. Share Observations, Not Accusations

Often, conflict arises because siblings live in different cities or visit at different times. One child may see daily struggles, while another sees only a “good day” during a short visit. This difference in perspective can lead to arguments: “You’re exaggerating” vs. “You don’t see what I see.”
The key is to share observations instead of accusations. For example:

  • Instead of: “You never help Mom.”
  • Try: “I’ve noticed Mom is skipping meals. I’m worried about her nutrition.”
    This language keeps the conversation focused on your parent’s needs rather than on sibling resentments.

3. Define Roles Based on Strengths

Not every sibling can contribute in the same way — and that’s okay. Some may live nearby and provide hands-on help, while others contribute financially or handle paperwork. Instead of comparing contributions, try dividing roles according to each person’s strengths.
For example:

  • A sibling with medical knowledge might coordinate doctor visits.
  • Another might manage finances or home maintenance.
  • A local sibling may handle day-to-day tasks, supported by professional caregivers who provide senior in-home help in Edmonton.
    When everyone’s role is acknowledged, siblings feel valued — and conflict decreases.

4. Bring in a Neutral Third Party

Sometimes, family discussions reach a standstill. That’s where outside support makes all the difference. A care manager, social worker, or professional in-home caregiver can provide perspective without family history clouding the conversation.
At Home Instead Edmonton, we often act as that neutral third party. By offering personalized in-home seniors care in Edmonton, we help families see what support looks like in practice. This takes the pressure off siblings and allows them to focus on being sons and daughters again — not just caregivers.

5. Remember the Shared Goal

When emotions run high, it’s easy to forget that all siblings share the same ultimate goal: keeping Mom or Dad safe, healthy, and comfortable. Remind each other of this shared purpose during tough conversations. A simple phrase like “We all love Dad and want what’s best for him” can reset the tone of a meeting.
Sometimes, achieving that goal means acknowledging that professional care is needed. Senior home care in Edmonton can be customized — from a few hours a week of companionship and meal support to 24/7 care. This flexibility allows families to ease into care together, making the decision less overwhelming.

How Home Instead Edmonton Helps Families Move Forward

Sibling disagreements about senior care are normal, but they don’t have to tear families apart. With the right strategies — and support — it’s possible to find common ground and ensure your parent receives the help they need.
At Home Instead Edmonton, we specialize in providing compassionate, reliable senior home care. Whether your loved one needs companionship, personal care, dementia support, or simply an extra hand with household tasks, our caregivers are here to help. Our trusted team offers dependable senior in-home help so your parent can age safely and comfortably at home — and so siblings can focus on being family, not just caregivers.
If your family is navigating disagreements about in-home seniors care in Edmonton, reach out today. We’ll listen, provide guidance, and help create a personalized care plan that meets your parent’s needs while easing the strain on the whole family.

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